Problems of Western Culture for AA Members

To enjoy being sober you need some meaning in life. The problem is most alcoholics do not get meaning of life from Western societies consumerism ways. It’s arguable that anybody does, but at least non-alcoholics can get by as a cog of civilisation without it leading them to drink and destroy themselves and those around them. To work your 40-60 hours a week, progress through your career, have a partner that is attractive enough for you to fuck and easy enough to spend time with, pop out some kids and take care of them, and one day buy a nice house; this is the Western way, we are weened on it from our TV shows, as this is what you should aspire to. It’s such a cliché that newcomers get sober and then put all these things ahead of their recovery

In a mens’ meeting one night I looked around the room, there were tells for the length of sobriety, those in the first few months, looked dishevelled and broken shells, they were hollow and for most their ego had abandoned them – this is exactly what they needed to get clean, you could see the creases in their brows as they tried to pay attention to the speaker, their mind racing in all directions, still physically affected by the drugs, but more so by the lack of them, their systems not yet adjusted to a clean mind. They wanted what was being shared, they looked up to the people with over a year like visions of Jesus, but in their hearts they believed they were unworthy and would never get it, yet they had no where else to go so they stayed on the suspicion that if they do what these cleaner folk tell them then they too may “get it”.

The guys with 6 months to 2 years either still had street clothes or had gone the other way and were all sophisticated, maybe even a suit. They looked physically healthy, but still had an awkwardness, like they we in someone else’s skin, they had a glow about them, the glow of hope and gratitude, ruddy cheeks and wide eyes. They rarely sat in the meeting the whole time, getting up for smokes and bantering amongst each other, they actually looked the happiest people in the meeting.

The guys with 2 – 7 years had their ego back, they were present in their bodies, and life was full of amazing opportunities. With the return of their ego came guile, they were no longer hopeless junkies and had things to offer the world, backs straight, muscles flexed, they had the look of ambition. They were serious and focussed, the meeting was work on their recovery, they identified with the speakers and felt empathy – mostly for themselves.

Then the 7 years and above, healthy, well dressed, the street had left them, even the ones covered in tattoos now had a softness to them, they had been domesticated, and they looked exhausted. From their stories of this is how it was and this is how it is now, the guys in early recovery looked at them in awe. These guys had careers, houses, wives, kids, and they did stuff like went on holidays. They had recovered from the disease of addiction and were living normal lives. They were inspirations.

But this is not all that I saw. I saw emasculated men exhausted from their jobs that were only just bearable and not looking forward to going home to their wives who were even less bearable. They were in the matrix. The society created by beta men so that everyone could gain access to his fair share of eggs. The desire for a pussy to fuck and fertilise had over-ruled all other rational thinking. They had gone from addiction to alcohol or heroin to an overweight and outdated pussy who nagged all the time and treated fucking like she was giving a gift. It was oxytocin addiction and the denial was as strong as what they had about their substance abuse.

The happiest AA and NA old timers I know all have three things in common. One; they still help other recovering addicts/alcoholics. 2; they do at least one meeting per week and three, they break societies rules. The most miserable 12 step old timers are those that try and be good little boys and girls, trying desperately to be normal when in actual fact normal is the social construct called civilisation that suits some, but not all and very few recovered alcoholics and addicts.