I am so afraid. I ask Jesus to come into my life. I am open. It’s ok to be afraid, meditate on fear, feel that tingly sensation, feel the uncertainty and not know what to do. Feel the tension in my neck as Gods light shines on me and says. “It’s ok to be afraid. Through exposing your fear to my light you can let in my love. It’s ok to not know what to do. I will guide you. Do your best, make mistakes. Trust my love. The object is not to act or think your way out of fear. The object is to accept it and “practice” trust. Yes practice, just try to trust as you try to do my will. Make mistakes and keep moving forward.”
“Feel the fear, feel your cheeks tingling, feel the helplessness. No matter what you do, how good you are, how much you achieve, there will always be fear. There will always be something more powerful than you threatening to make your life a misery at any second. I am not the father to stop these tragedies happening. I am the father. Let the fear bubble to the surface, feel it twirling in your gut and radiating out through the pins and needles in your head. The fear is part of you, an important emotion, but it gets stuck. Take this time to allow it to flow. Give up on ideas, plans, and ways to overcome and stop the fear. Just let it flow. Believe in my process of the 10th step, believe in the method I have chosen to expose the fears and now let them flow.
Bellow fear is sadness. Allow yourself to love me. Let your heart open and warm the icy fear. Feel your chest warming. Feel the hate and fear dripping off your arms and out your legs. And now feel sadness, feel alone and unloved. Imagine yourself just before you were born. In the feotal position. Surrounded by warmth, but completely alone and isolated, powerless and vulnerable. Now feel sadness. For the unborn you. The pain you have yet to go through. And just stay here in this love and sadness. Resist the temptation to leave. Love your life.
Red Pill Recovery 